In Memory of Matthew Schultz

Faithful readers, bear with me, or skip this post. There will be no tips and tricks in this post, but perhaps a few memories and food for thought in the grand scheme of things. I do feel the need to say goodbye to an old friend and pass along what I have learned about life, death, and how the choices we make affect everything. If you choose to join me, you are more than welcome. If you pass by without a glance, I understand.
On Friday, June 5, 2009, Matthew Schultz drown in the Missouri River. He was an old friend of mine, though we hadn't seen each other in a decade. He and I formed a band while I was in college and he was just out of High School. We had 3 names, as the writing and demoing process went: Wampa Spectrum, Wombat Spectrum, and Susperia. (We always preferred Wampa Spectrum, but figured if we ever released an album, George Lucas might take us down for using "Wampa".) Anyway, I was the principal songwriter with my Amiga-based studio (running OctaMED, with a Yamaha RY-30 Drum Machine and Casio CZ-101 keyboard slaved to it). He was the impetuous kid I met at work who styled himself to be somewhere between Paul Stanley and Rob Zombie - he was neither, but his voice really worked well with my writing style.

We started to cut our demo in Pumpkin Shell Studio (owned by musician extraordinaire Richard Schultz). We completed one rough demo for the song "(E)motion Violation". This has been my favorite song from my catalog for a long time. I recently began to re-make it in my current studio, because state-of-the-art home recording has come so far since that demo was cut in 1995 or 1996. I cannot continue on that project at this time. The rough mix with Matt singing will stand. I plan to release it here in the near future.

Anyway, we had compiled the songs for an EP. We had it priced out, planned out, and were going to start auditioning local guitarists to replace some of the scratch guitar samples I had used. I took a vacation, he had a change of heart during that time, and we called it quits. End of the band, end of my music for many years. We exchanged emails once in a while for a couple years, but then he disappeared for a while, and I had no idea where he was until last year. Yet I put off getting in touch with him, and now it's too late to send him an email.

So what, right?

Here's what: I went to the Memorial service his brother held for him (on the shore of the Missouri River, close to where he died). I only knew a couple people there, but most were from Matt's life after I lost touch with him. Everyone said the same basic things about him - his quest for knowledge, his drive to pursue his dreams, the way he was on a journey through life. There were Rocket Balloon Races, Belly Dancers, Singing, Glow Sticks, Drums, and a solemn sing-along of KISS' "Shout It Out Loud", all in Matt's honor.

Near the end of the memorial, I realized that the person they were talking about was not the same person I remembered. All the talk of his being on a journey, and his journey had come to an end in the river. It was then that I realized that I knew Matt at the beginning of the journey, when he was still the impetuous kid idolizing his big brother and not yet seeking answers to the big mysteries. He had grown, evolved, and pursued a life much bigger than any normal life.

And that's when I realized why learning about Matt's life in the past ten years and his untimely death shook me up so much: I could have been him. He pursued some of the same topics I myself had been studying earlier in life. He chased his dreams. I took the safe path: went to college, got a steady job with a conservative company, got married, had kids. Safe across the board.

Matt lived life boldly, and he died boldly. He left his mark on all the people he ever met. I am known as being more reliable than spontaneous. Matt's death is a wake-up call to me in a lot of ways. I know I need to live life more fully, instead of putting it on the "to do" list. Pursue my creative goals doggedly, not passively. That's not to say I'm quitting my job and running away from responsibilities. It's about unlocking the passions and the fires that burn inside. If we don't fan the flames, the dreams will die in a vacuum.

Adding a little more kindling to my "wake up call" - the day before I learned of Matt's death, I was in a car accident that left my car pretty much totaled, but somehow I walked away from with only a slightly sore arm and shoulder. (I was hit directly in the driver's side door and the car was thrown a considerable distance.) I have been living a safe life. Even when bad things happen to me, they happen to me safely.

Matt lived a spontaneous life, and a spontaneous decision to wade into the Missouri River led to his death being broadcast on the evening news. I envy Matt his choices in life. It's not often that we can see a glimpse of what we might have been had we made different choices. I have seen that alternate history of my life, in the shapshots of Matt's life. And the single biggest impression I saw of Matt's adult life is how many people he touched, and how deeply he connected with life on every level.

Although I regret not getting to see the "upgraded" Matt of the last ten years, I cannot dwell on it. I am assimilating what I can, and will move forward with more purpose in my life. I will straddle the line of the safe and the unsafe and grab for that brass ring.

I'll miss you Matt. We all will.

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Gear Review: REAPER v.3.01 now available!

REAPER has now released version 3.01, and there are some nice changes to it. There is so much new about it, it's hard to know where to start. REAPER's website (http://www.reaper.fm) also has been given a very slick overhaul that now screams "I am a serious contender!". They also appear to have raised the prices slightly (now $225 for full commercial and $60 for discounted) and gotten away from the previously confusing "commercial" vs. "non-commercial" terminology. Basically, if you use it for yourself only, as a business with less than $20K annual income, or are a educational or non-profit, you qualify for discounted pricing. And they still adamantly refuse to engage in any strange copy protection schemes. It's the honor system, folks!

My favorite new features are probably the addition of Automation lanes and the ability to have multiple MIDI items in the editor at the same time. However, there's a lot of other goodness packed into version 3. I'll try to give my take on some of the features here. The full feature list for version 3 is at http://www.reaper.fm/whatsnew-300.txt.

Automation Lanes
Automation lanes are a really nice feature that already exist in a lot of other major DAWs, so seeing REAPER add them is a great step forward to full equality. In prior versions, you could see your automation lines as overlays over the track itself. If you were trying to automate a lot of parameters on the same track, it got rather messy and I was always either having to memorize exactly where I was shifting other parameters, or when I displayed multiple lines at the same time (for reference) I was always grabbing the wrong line (i.e. changing the wrong setting). Now with Automation lanes, the automation parameter lines appear as separate sub-track "lanes" that you can display, hide, or bypass on an individual basis. With all of the parameter-heavy VSTs and VSTis out there, this is a great thing.

Edit Multiple MIDI Items
It's sometimes hard to keep track of what is going on between different MIDI tracks. Previously, to edit multiple MIDI tracks, you had to open separate MIDI windows and fiddle with the window sizes so you could get everything on screen at the same time. As of version 3, you now have options in the "Options" menu of the MIDI window named "Reuse MIDI editor for multiple items" and "Reuse MIDI editor for multiple items, keeping items as secondary". The first will just reuse the window. No big surprise there. The second one - wow. It will shade the notes and parameter settings (like velocity) for any items in the window that are not currently active. The really nice thing about this is that all MIDI items are shown in proper time-context. In other words, all notes are exactly where they should be in relation to one another. This is great for trying to harmonize different synths together - you can actually see what you're doing without a lot of trial and error. You can switch between which MIDI item is active in the window by either using the "Filter" button in the top left, or by simply clicking on a note from the item you want to edit. The clicking on a note can be problematic in a couple of ways - you can't directly write a note over the top of another MIDI item's note, since it will select that track instead of putting down a note - and you can't always see the other item's notes if the current track overlaps. But really, these are spatial issues, not UI issues. I'm loving it!

Multiple Tabbed Projects
Another exciting improvement is the ability to have multiple projects loaded at the same time. This is handled beautifully by the addition of a simple tab control at the top of the screen. Obviously, this adds load on your system as you add more simultaneous projects, but the flexibility this allows is so much better than the prior one-at-a-time design.

A Lot More...
There are so many improvements, many behind the scenes performance upgrades, it is an exhausting list to read. There are a lot of MIDI enhancements (MIDI sysex is now fully supported, for example). Ther are also quite a few general performance enhancements to make REAPER play nicer with some potentially unruly plug-ins. And a lot of memory management improvements. Bottom line: you need this upgrade. If you're not a current REAPER user, now is the perfect time to jump in and try it out. The trial version is NOT time limited or crippled in any way. You've got nothing to lose, and version 3 continues the trend of growing stronger and more powerful with each release.

Read the full post here!